I haven’t written anything here for a while. When I do write something it’s meaningless posts. I’m not stopping to write but for a while I have decided to only use Instagram. I would be excited if you would join me there! My account is cecilia.helin.39. Take care!
Category: Exercise
Keeping weight
I haven’t mentioned my weight struggles in a long time. I have told and showed you my big belly. I have actually managed to keep the fat away from my belly. Or I have times where I have put on weight on my belly and the rest of my body but mostly I somehow seem to keep the same weight all the time. There’s no secret about it. I workout like crazy! That’s the only reason I don’t put on much weight. Thankfully I love to exercise. I workout almost everyday. I do lower body workout one day. The next day I workout my upper body. And I always do around 25 minutes of ab workout with every workout. I have to do that otherwise my belly would be very very big. I like the ab workout the least but that’s the most important part of every workout.

I eat the same food I always have. I’m aware of the fact that changing my diet would help a lot but I love food. To eat healthy all the time would make me feel sad. I’m depressed enough and I don’t want to change my diet and get even sicker. I eat breakfast, dinner, an evening meal and later a tasty snack. I always drink a protein shake after working out. That keeps me full for a while. The protein shakes also takes away the sugar cravings I used to have all day before I began drinking them. For all of you having very bad sugar cravings try drinking a protein shake everyday even if you don’t workout. That could hopefully help you overcome some of the cravings.

I understand that many of you don’t like working out or that you don’t lose any weight when you do some kind of exercising. To me it’s easy because not only do I like working out but it also helps me to lose weight. Try to workout even if you don’t like it. Or if you don’t see any changes in your body when you exercise try to do different and harder workouts. I could advice you to eat healthier but because I don’t do that it would feel wrong for me to tell you to try that. Don’t get me wrong. Everyday is a struggle for me to keep my weight. I workout and all that but sometimes it feels hopeless when I put on weight even though I try to do all I can not to. All I can say is we’re in this together.

Excessive training
I hurt my shoulder a while back. The reason was that I exercised too much and too hard. I did both leg and arm workouts with resistance bands. I used the resistance band with every workout. The majority of the workouts I do is bodyweight only but I added the band and that made it hard to exercise. I was obsessed with getting more muscles fast. I exercised like that almost everyday. In the beginning it was fine. I began to use the resistance band only when I did lower body workouts. Then I thought it would be a good idea to use it when I did arm workouts.
This worked out fine for a while. I got more muscles all over. The resistance band made me get more muscles really fast. Especially my arms grew bigger than then they had ever been before. Then one day one of my shoulders really hurt very bad. It got to the point where I couldn’t use the arm on the side where the “broken” shoulder was. I tried lots of creams and lotions that should heal sore muscles. Nothing helped. Some helped for a couple of hours but the pain never went away.

For those of you that aren’t addicted to exercise would probably do no exercise at all while your shoulder healed. I have a serious addiction to exercise and to do nothing wasn’t an option. Instead I did “flexible” workout. Stretch workouts that healed sore muscles. It wasn’t the workouts I usually did but at least I did something. It helped! It took time and effort but I stuck to my workout plan. Today my shoulder has healed but I never workout with resistance band anymore. I rather do body weight workouts. Excited that I can exercise often. Yippie.

Weight
I have had big problems when it comes to weight. I have told you about my belly that has been a huge problem. I have been thin almost my whole life. It’s medicines that has made me gain weight. Once it was a medicine for my anxiety that made me gain almost one more me in weight. This time I think I know which medicine it is that causes the weight gain but I have to take it or I will get mentally exhausted again.
I exercise almost everyday and since I saw the state my belly was in I’ve done ab exercises with every workout. I have worked the abs like crazy. I love to exercise however the ab workout I could do without. I’ve never been into working out my abs but I knew a while ago I had to do it. I looked pregnant. The belly hanged down. I got disgusted with myself. I looked like a ball!
For a long time I have worked out very hard. My belly is smaller! It took a loooooooooong time but I’m on the right track. I know that if I ate healthier I would have gotten an even smaller belly. But I love food and I can’t do it. I rather workout like I do because that has helped me.


Proud.
Here
I’m very sorry I haven’t been here for a while. My depression a long with the heat wave has made me feel uninspired! I don’t know if you either have had a heatwave or lots of rain but here it’s been HOT! You would think Sweden was a country where it was always cold and polar bears walking around shivering in this cold. But we’ve had this hot weather with, what it feels like, 100% humidity.
I hurt my shoulder a while ago because I had exercised too hard. It was a pain that made me unable to workout. All I could do was making these stretching workouts. For someone addicted to exercise it was hard not to workout like I always do which is hard and for a long time. My shoulder doesn’t hurt that bad anymore and I can exercise a little.
I will be back soon with a longer post. Take care.

Weight loss
I am proud to say that I have worked out like crazy. Almost everyday. It’s not only work outs it’s hysterical workouts. I do either my upper or lower body for about 1 hour. Then I do 30 minutes of ab workout. My body has grown bigger because I have gained muscles. I wrote “Weight loss” but I have gained weight because of the muscles. When it comes to body fat I have lost some weight.
I love women that have a big lower body (I don’t love women “that” way I only think that women with a bigger lower body is something I want for my body). With all my workouts I have almost achieved that. I know I look fat and I have lots of fat that I need to get rid of but I am excited to say that it’s not only fat. I am not anywhere near where I want to be but I feel like I could reach my goal sometime. My belly is big and I don’t know what to do. The thing is I have gotten some visible ab muscles but even so my belly continues to “hang”. I know with age it gets harder to lose weight but with all the work I put in to slim down my belly would be much smaller.
I know that my diet is………………..it’s not a diet. I eat what I want. I could never starve myself. A “starve diet” isn’t good in the long run. I should cut down on some things but it’s hard.


Take care!
Here sometime
I want to say a big Thank you to all my new and old followers for reading my blog. For the moment I’m into Instagram big time. I love to write here but because my depression is hard at the moment and I find Instagram easier because you can write shorter post. I write lots there. I’m not saying I think writing blog posts are hard but now I get tired whatever I do and that’s why I’m just here sometimes.
On my Instagram I write about the same things I do here.
A thing that I posted on Instagram.

If you want to follow me on Instagram it’s cecilia.helin.39.
I’ll post this in every cathegory so it reaches all of you.
See you there or sometimes here.
Weight
I struggle with my weight. You know that I have compared myself to a sausage because we are stuffed under our skin ready to burst. I don’t know however I feel that some of the fat on my body has turned into muscles. I exercise too much I know that. I have days where I don’t train at all but it’s hard. I want to exercise every day but it’s not healthy. I have to force myself to have exercise free days. I want to loose weight and too much exercise I think makes more harm than good. When you exercise everyday your body never gets to build muscles and burn fat. I have also told you that I can hardly get my jeans on because of all the fat. I think it also has to do with that I’ve gained muscles. I want bigger legs and arms and my legs are bigger. I think both the fat and my new muscles has something to do with me not getting my jeans on.


The thing I should try harder with is food. I can’t go on a diet because then I’m hungry all the time. I know there are diets where you don’t feel hungry but they are complicated and you have to change everything you eat. For example I can’t go without carbs. Everywhere you look carbs is the cause of weight gain and lots more. When I don’t eat carbs I get physically sick. I have to eat something from every food “group” everyday. I try to eat less but then I’m hungry and I eat unhealthy. I don’t eat candy but I haven’t seen that helping with the weight. I will continue with not eating candy though because I feel better without it.


I try and that’s all you can do. My belly is where almost all the fat gather. I have well trained legs and arms and then this chunk of fat on my belly. I do abs exercises everytime I exercise and I think the belly is getting stronger. I’m frustrated because I want the belly to shrink faster than it does. I will keep up with the abs exercise until I see some change.

Exercising
I am doing all I can to get rid of my enormous belly. I know many of you probably think that my belly isn’t big but to me it is. When I was younger I never did any ab workouts because there was nothing to work on. Now I’ve been doing ab workouts with every arm and leg workout however I am not seeing that much of a change. I mean I’m doing a very extensive ab workout to get every part of my belly exercised. It’s lower and upper abs and more. I do an 17 minutes ab workout. I should have gotten further than I am.



I feel my jeans going on a little smoother though. I know my legs have gotten bigger because of my exercise and that has something to do with my jeans getting too small. Before I had to pull them hard to get them on. I was afraid they would fall a part with every pull because I had to use all my strength to get them on. Even now I pull hard to get my jeans on but it doesn’t take that long anymore. It’s not a big change but I could have lost belly fat even though I don’t see any change. I compare my jeans to sausage “skin”. They are filled to the absolute max. I’m waiting for the day they won’t fit anymore. I have written this before and the fear of my jeans breaking when I’m in public isn’t gone. I’m happy every time I get home without any “breaking” incident happening. I have more jeans but they’re small too. Time to buy bigger I think.

The biggest change I’ve done when it comes to eating to loose weight is that I’ve stopped eating candy. I told you about it in “Sugar ban” where I wrote what I’ve done to ban candy from my life. It’s hard to do and I wrote that to possible help someone to also stop. I thought I never could do it but I did. I often ate candy to have something to do. I haven’t even touched any candy for a long time! I had to stop eating candy because it affected me and my body more than I thought it ever could. I’m not saying I will never eat candy again however now I’m not craving candy in any way.

From me and my jeans, we stay together until they break!
Workout
I think every workout addict out there find that non workout days are unbearable. I could workout everyday but I know it does more harm than good. When I don’t exercise my mental health gets crazy. I get sad and stressed and have this feeling of discomfort. I feel that my muscles will disappear on the days when I don’t do some kind of workout. If you’re a workout addict you know what I mean.
The funny thing is that I’ve read that on the days you don’t exercise is when you build muscles. I think it has something to do with that workout “breaks down” your muscles. When you take a day off they “heal” and your muscles grow. I try to think about that but it’s hard to not workout.
There’s nothing better than to exercise until you get shaky and the muscles are sore. I love being sore also the next day cause then I know I’ve done something that strengthens my body. I have to plan those workout free days. I usually plan something else to do. When I don’t have nothing else to do I often train even though I had decided not to. I can’t help myself.
Just a heads up. These pictures were taken after a hard workout session. That’s why I look sweaty. I know I should do a spray tan because I’m whiter than white.
This is my hair washed and fresh. On the rest of the pictures it looks sweaty.



